Summer break is not over yet (she says as she cries into a pint of ice cream) but I’m so far behind my dream goal that there isn’t a snowball’s chance in hell I’m reaching anywhere near it. Writing a 50k-word rough draft over summer break with two kids in tow?! Ha! Ha ha ha! What was I thinking?!
We’re well into August and I have only 9,929 words out of 50k, a.k.a. 20%.
By all accounts, I am failing miserably. Clearly, past-Ariane had entirely forgotten how relentlessly exhausting kids are when you can’t catch a break. Even when I can find the time to write, I have no brain to write with. NO BRAIN! It left me around day 11 of summer, right after my first sunburn but before I replaced my whole recipe repertoire with crackers and ice cream, which happened on day 12.
But back to the point. GOALS. I had one once. I think it left too. It hitched a ride with my brain and there are still skid marks where the tires squealed as they sped away in a Trans Am. (This is the only fast car I could conjure on the fly, because I live in 1980 apparently.)
Nevertheless, am I sorry I aimed too high? I am embarrassed I failed epically?
Sometimes, you need a realistic goal and a strategic path to get you there. I could have done the math to figure out what word count I needed to achieve daily in order to reach my end-of-summer deadline. But in this case, had I done the math, I would have known from the start that my goal was not realistic for this stay-at-home mom and I would have not even tried.
So sometimes you need a big impossible goal to dare take the first step.
Even if I didn’t write another word for the remainder of summer, I’d still have 20% of a book written. That’s not nothing! I knew summers are hard for me, but I didn’t give up entirely and now I have something to show for it. I take that as a win.
And summer isn’t over yet! What do you say we keep dreaming big and pretend I can write that last 40k before the end of August? Sure, that seems like a nice impossible goal. I better get started on that.